It is needless to say that kids need attention from the very time they are born- they need love, they look for undivided attention, someone to play with, someone to inspire them and stimulate their mind. Regardless of this, parents need to balance between giving constant attention by hovering over their shoulders all the time and giving them space and independence.

My Time – My Way

Allowing children to have ‘me’ time enhances the lives of both parents and kids. For children it is the time to have unstructured fun; as a parent, you shouldn’t be mixing this ‘me’ time with homework or making the kids do some of their cleaning work. The beauty of solitude is that kids aren’t answerable for things they are doing. This time is considered as ‘free’ time and can go flexibly with their mood. Kids feel happy getting some of this time daily.

A structured routine will help kids make their lives function better, but this ‘me’ time will help them pursue their passion and hobbies, make them think out of the box, be creative, and train them to unwind their stress and get away from mundane routines. Make your little one(s) the owner of their ‘me’ time and let them do whatever they wish to do. However, that by any chance doesn’t mean that your peace of mind is taken for a toss!

Balancing Act

Solitude will help your little one build trust in himself/ herself and you as well. As a parent, you need to understand that the amount of time spent together will not necessarily add much to your child’s academic achievements, emotional well-being or behavior.

What does matter is the quality of time spent with them. Again, balance is the key; both you and your little one need time spent together and apart. The goal is to balance both family time and solitude.

A certain amount of solitude gives children control over their time, feelings & emotions; it also gives them a feeling of freedom. In solitude, children can work at their own pace and learn how to wade through different situations.

Dealing with emotions- Learning or Challenge

Children shouldn’t be forced into activities during their solitude. Experiencing solitude helps kids to learn certain tasks; they learn to deal with their emotions and how to cope with any unexpected emotional rush. This does not mean that solitude is superior to social interaction when it comes to learning and handling emotions. It simply means that the two work together to help kids become the best they can be. It is a time for them to understand themselves better and build a positive connection with themselves. The right amount of time spent alone can even improve empathy and social skills. Solitude also helps kids to form lasting memories. When kids are given an environment to learn, repeat, rehearse, revise on their own, they happen to build and strengthen the feeling of being independent and realising their capabilities.

Last thing before we tuck tight!

Before bidding goodbye for the day, you can help your little one rewind the incident that had made him/ her feel restless or react strangely; let him/ her find out various ways where he/ she could have dealt with the situation differently. You too can help them understand their emotions and suggest some ways to deal with the situation in a more appropriate way. However, make sure these are just suggestions and shouldn’t look like an imposed decision on them. In some way, these little talks or discussions prove to be a good wind-up session for kids before they tuck themselves into bed.

Solitude may mean that time for kids that they spend with themselves learning new things without feeling self-conscious. Let the whole process of Solitude be more of self-learning and self-realization for them without making them feel guilty.
Solitude is creativity’s best friend and refreshment for one’s soul- Naomi Judd